by Jeanni Ritchie
We’ve all been guilty of ignoring them. Those red flags that pop up to warn us that something isn’t quite right. Sometimes we reason out their presence, either our hearts or another person trying to convince us it’s all in our head. Satan is a master of red flag disguise, the ultimate gaslighter. Our mental health suffers.
We get hurt, burned one too many times, and even the hint of red becomes a charging bull from which we run. Our spiritual health suffers.
In Matthew 10:16, Jesus says, “Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves.” In this passage, the serpent symbolizes wisdom and awareness of potential dangers, while the dove represents peace and innocence. We are not called to launch a counterattack nor to fastidiously seek the motives of others. Rather we are to notice when things seem amiss and tread carefully.
I’ve learned this lesson the hard way. Preferring the ostrich mentality of sticking my head in the sand, I found myself deeply hurt by people whose actions I overlooked repeatedly. Shocked when I could no longer deny the red flags that had popped up for years, I swung the pendulum in a complete opposite direction. The tiniest red flag in a relationship sent me scurrying for the hills. I trusted no one. It was a lonely place.
When I finally understood the concept Jesus had been teaching, I was able to both accept the flaws of others while protecting myself. A friend with a push-pull relationship, running hot and cold with your friendship, is a red flag. But it also indicates a struggle that isn’t necessarily about you. You can take a step back without running away.
Likewise you may find that the Lord is severing a tie between you and a friend for your own good, a spiritual surgery that, while painful, is necessary for your growth. Wise as serpents. Not everything has to blow up; sometimes you must quietly retreat.
There’s no one size fits all when it comes to navigating red flags. But there is One Spirit Who reigns supreme. Draw close to Him and your steps will be made with ease.
Read more faith essays at faithunfaded.com.